Dancing in my dream

A laugh raises from deep within my throat
I have to hold back the desire to mock my past life
My toes are wet with the morning dew
Each drop whispers of the freedom I have found

The sun lights up my eyes and the green reflection dances in the rays
My jail is far behind me and I am now twirling in bliss
The music that’s in my ears is too lovely for me to describe
Love is endless

My happiness is founded in love
I have given up the fight against it
The thickets laced with rules and religion have been destroyed
I dance in the delight of God

I see the beauty in all He has created
No one lacking or better than each other
I smile with the knowing that no one person can love better than an other
I am free now

The endless woods of striving have fallen from my memory
I was so proud, blinded by religion
Every one is equal
No one is “lost”

I smile again
Dancing in my dream
My life is beautiful

I Hurt

This pain is stabbing my chest
I run as fast as my feet will take me
Each thorn of rejection I hit makes tears of love fall from my cheeks
They are piercing my vary soul
They once told me they loved me...
Im not following the "path" Im not perfect
Now these trees bite me with their branches
Slapping words like unworthy and shit across my scarred body
My heart keeps getting wounded...
Does no one know how to love?
Can no one see Im beautiful the way I am
Being who I am
I fall flat in a mud called man made guilt
I struggle to stand up and yet I do
I will no longer let man run my life
These thickets of a lust for authority would try and break my freedom
Im to wild for that
Im to lovely for that!
I wish this pain would go away
Just let me love...please
I bow my head a tears come running down my face
All I want is to be alone and let sorrow overtake me
So thats its storm with pass and I will find myself again
Then I can come to you...how did I ever find you?
Always accepting who I am and never condeming...I thank God for you my love!!

I Am Well

( the spellings horrid, I had no time for spell check today:P)

All the burdens that were pushing on my body have melted away
All the striving that I had been doing is now a goast to me
All the seeking I had been egnoring is now the adveture of my life

I feel so light
I feel the air washing over me whispering words of grace
I feel a calm I have never felt before

Still questions and doubts wirl in my head and heart
Still they some times haunt me
Still however the peace I have about them it sweeter than before

No one tells me who I must be or what I must do
No one can define me, or point at me
No one had a hold on me

I am who I am and not trying to be anything more
I am who I want to be
I am not searching to be found

I peer in on this world and see all its beauty
I look deeper than religion
I look to the sky and watch God

My eyes are always seeing
My heart is always loving
My soul is forever safe in my Fathers arms

Im not falling
Im not fading
Im not hiding

Here I am
Here I am
Here I am

All my wounds and scarrs here for you to see..I laugh anyway
All my sins and shame are here for you judgment..I love anyway
All my questions and insecurties are fresh on my skin..I'll hope anyway!

The beautiful souls on this earth are my delight
No one is ever lost...only hurt and forgotten
What if we dared to love insted of Judge them all??

I am no better than a murderer
I am no better than someone lost in depression
I am no better period

I am lost if they are lost
And if they are lost...then so are you
Live life and love..don't waste your time wondering if your right or wrong

I AM FREE HAHAHA

Random Thoughts With No Direction

What was once crystal clear, now is only fog
What was once a reality is now only a dream
What was once beauty is now filthy

I don't know what I want
I don't know what I need
I don't know what I should do

I can't move backwards
I can't stay here
I can't give up

Im waiting on something
Im watching for something
Im hoping it really is there

Keep your tongue at bay
Keep your mouth closed
Keep your opinion to yourself

Im fed up with anything other than love
Im fed up with hypocrisy
Im fed up with fear

My angry words are the expression of my frustrations
My calm words are the expression of my exhaustion
My bitter words are the expression of my pain

Im seeking for deeper
Im seeking for better
Im seeking for sleep

My spirit is Raging with desires
My heart is conflicted with doubt
My mind is pondering life

The only one Im battling is myself
The only one Im afraid of is myself
The only one Im angry at is myself

Think what you want...I don't give a shit
Think what you need to make yourself feel good
Think what you need to justify your conditional love

If only I knew how to get all that is in me out
If only I knew how to find an ultimate expression
If only I could fight my demons with my bare hands

My soul is to deep
My spirit is to misunderstood
My heart is to abused

Who would dare risk swimming in my depths???
Who would dare play beyond my shallows???
Who would dare fight for who I am???

If all you want is my body...fuck you!!
If all you want is my support...fuck you!!
If all you want is my love...you already have it, so let me live

ITS TO SHALLOW!!!
I NEED DEEPER!!!
I NEED MORE!!!

Where is intimacy?
Where is vulnerability?
Where is fun?

My past is filled with wounds
My past is filled with insecurities instilled
My past is filled with doubt

My thoughts are so confused Im going in circles
My mind is so full its waiting for release
My soul is so complicated I need more

Shh my head hurts
Shh my heart hurts
Shh my eyes are open

All Around Me

I am IN LOVE with this song. Its the ultimate way to describe what God makes me feel by romancing me with LIFE. I love my life.


All Around Me
(Flyleaf)

My hands are searching for you...
My arms are outstretched towards you
l feel you on my fingertips...
My tongue dances behind my lips for you
This fire runs in through my being...
Burning...
I'm not used to seeing you

I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel you all around me,
thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling,
savoring this heart that's healed

My hands float up above me....
And you whisper you love me
And I begin to fade...
Into our secret place
The music makes me sway...
The angels singing say
We are alone with you...
I am alone and they are too with you

And so I cry...
The light is white...
And I see you...

I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel you all around me,
thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling,
savoring this heart that's healed

Take my hand I give it to you
Now you own me , all I am..
You said you would never leave me
I believe you, I beleive...
I can feel you all around me
thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling,

savoring this heart that's healed.